


It Was Bound To Happen At Some Point

by Desirae



Series: Loved you forever [9]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Angst, Bottom Castiel, Deepthroating, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Fluff, Jealousy, Love, M/M, Married Destiel, NSFW, Smut, Top Dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-11
Packaged: 2018-05-20 01:46:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5987908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Desirae/pseuds/Desirae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You wanna explain to me how I find out you've been having secret dinners with your ex behind my back, yet somehow, I'm on the couch?" Dean's voice held baffled disbelief.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Castiel is lying to Dean about working late, but there is a reasonable explanation. Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The first chapter in the next timestamp of the Loved You Forever verse. As per usual, it can be read on it's own, though I would love if you read them all. Hope you enjoy it.
> 
>  
> 
> [](http://imgur.com/1FWIW1h)

Dean quietly untangled himself from Castiel and slid fom the bed. As he made his way to the bathroom Dean had to fight the urge to crawl back under the covers and snuggle into his husband for just a few more minutes. Dean hated finals week. And he wasn't even in school. But he almost wished he were, perhaps then he would get see his professor more. Everything was a rush at the end of May. The semester was almost over and Castiel had mountains of papers to read and staff meetings to attend, often staying in the office till past nine o'clock. By the time he would catch the T home, Dean would already be in bed, having to be up early for work himself. Castiel would strip and stumble naked into bed and wrap himself around Dean like an octopus, too exhausted to do anything else. Dean could tell you, jerking off in the shower, imagining his naked husband in the next room, was not nearly as much fun as jerking off _with_ his husband. It had been four days of no sex. That may not be a long time for some people, but for Dean it was a lifetime. He missed his husband. He missed his taste, and his sounds. He missed his earthy scent as he buried his face in the crook of his neck. Mostly he missed how they would curl around each other afterward and just enjoy the bliss of being together.

To make matters worse, it was Friday and Dean couldn't even look forward to it. He had agreed to cover a bartending shift at the Roadhouse so Garth and his wife Bess could attend Lamaze class. Cas' work would mostly be done, but instead of being able to come and keep his husband company while he worked, Castiel had to attend some mandatory end of the semester dinner. So not only was Dean missing his husband, he was missing a free stuffed lobster dinner as well. Not that he was pouting or anything. Not at all. It was perfectly reasonable for Cas to have a staff meeting the night before and then a dinner that evening. _Because combining the two would have just been too logical,_ he thought to himself, irritated.

Dean relieved himself and flushed before turning on the shower. He quickly brushed his teeth as he waited for the temp to go up. He got into the shower and found himself lathering his hair with Cas' apple scented shampoo instead of his usual dollar store _suave_. He languidly tugged at his slowly filling cock as the heat and the fruity scent brought images of his love to his mind. As he stroked himself he pictured the way Castiel would arch into his touch as he ran his fingers down his spine. He imagined how Cas' breath would hitch when Dean would spread his cheeks and gently lap at his pink rosette. He thought of how Cas would keen and pant out his name as Dean stroked his cock while sucking at his rim. Dean braced a hand against the wet tiles as he spilled over his fist, fantasizing about his husband.

Dean padded back into their bedroom to get dressed.

"Come back to bed," Cas grumbled, face half smooshed into Dean's pillow. Dean pulled his jeans up and walked back over to the bed. He ran a hand through Cas' soft hair and leaned down to kiss at the bolt of his jaw.

"I wish I could sweetheart, but I have to head out soon. I have to have that asshole Adler's BMW fixed by five if I am gonna make it on time to cover Bess' shift."

Zachariah Adler was a total dick, but he paid extra for quick service and sent them business through referrals, so Dean had to play nice. Cas rolled over onto his back and squinted up at Dean as he watched him grab a spare tee-shirt and jeans and throw them into a duffle bag. A change of clothes for when he went to the Roadhouse.

"I miss you, baby," Cas said softly, his tone stopping Dean's movements. Dean came back to lean down again, this time to give Cas a gentle kiss. But Cas didn't want gentle. His hand reached up to fist in Dean's damp hair as he licked into his mouth, deepening the kiss. Dean sighed into Cas' mouth, allowing himself this moment, before he had to pull away, chuckling as Castiel tried to hold his bottom lip hostage with his teeth.

"Did you use my shampoo?" he whispered against Dean's lips.

"Maybe," he replied, sheepishly.

"Awwww."

"Shut up."

"But that's so sweet," Cas teased.

"Can it," Dean groused as he pulled on is boots.

"You wanted to smell like me."

Dean leveled Cas with a Sam Winchester worthy bitch face. "I seem to recall a certain professor wearing my AC/DC tee-shirt under his dress shirt, the other day."

"It was cold," Castiel sniffed indignantly.

"It was 60 degrees outside."

"The lecture hall is chilly, Dean."

"Good God, you're stubborn."

Castiel snickered. "Hey, if the dinner doesn't last too long, I will come down to the Roadhouse so we can go home together, okay?"

"Sounds good sweetheart. You still got another hour now, though, so go back to sleep."

"M'kay," Cas murmured, already back under the covers, face buried in Dean's pillow. "Love you."

"Love you."

Dean headed out to the kitchen and pulled the package of wheat wraps from the bread basket. He set a nonstick pan on the stove and turned the heat on low after dropping a small slab of butter on it. He pulled eggs, cheese and milk from the fridge and a bag of frozen peppers and onions from the freezer. He had just enough time to throw together some breakfast wraps before the commute to work became clogged. He scrambled the eggs, and added the cheese, peppers and onions. Dean was just starting to spoon the mixture onto one of the wraps when he heard Cas' phone buzz on the charger. And it really buzzed. His dork of a husband had set the text notification to sound like a bumblebee. Freaked Dean the fuck out the first time he heard it, to Castiel's delight. Cas had laughed until tears streamed down his face, like Dean nearly crashing the Impala while swatting away at an invisible bee, was the funniest thing in the world.

"Who the hell is texting at 6 am?" Dean mumbled aloud, picking up the cell.

_Sender: Alfie_

_I had such a wonderful time last night. I have really missed you. Looking forward to seeing you again. I think I'll try the chocolate raspberry cheesecake next time_.

It took Dean a moment to process what he was reading. Last night? Cheesecake? Cas was at a staff meeting last night. Wasn't he? Dean read the text again, over and over, and at each pass, felt a little sicker. His hand was shaking as he stared at the phone and he was seriously contemplating on whether or not he was about to throw up on the kitchen floor. Cas was lying to him? _His Cas_? Sneaking out to dinner and dessert with his ex and telling him he was at work? Dean put the phone down and braced both of his hands on the counter, taking deep breaths. His throat felt constricted and his eyes burned with the tell-tale sign of threatening tears, but he held them back. He wanted to go confront Castiel, rip back the covers and demand an explanation. But at the same time he didn't. Because if there wasn't a reasonable explanation, if there wasn't some damn good reason for why his _fucking_ husband was _fucking_ lying to him and seeing his ex behind his back, Dean wasn't sure he wouldn't break right then. Castiel waking up and realizing he had picked the wrong guy was a fear he had worked long and hard to get past, and seeing that text from Alfie was like someone throwing a bucket of ice water in his face. He felt cold and numb. Dean blindly reached for his own phone and mechanically texted Bobby and Benny to let them know he wouldn't be in. Looked like Mr. Adler's day was doomed for disappointment. Dean shakily grabbed his keys and purposely left his phone on the counter. He needed to drive, and he didn't need the distraction of people calling to check up on him or ask him where the hell he was. He didn't need Castiel to call him. Not when he wasn't ready to hear what he had to say yet. Not just yet. 

* * *

 

When Castiel found his way into the kitchen an hour later he was puzzled. Were they out of coffee? Dean always set the coffee to brew for him before he left. Then his eyes wondered over to the mess on the counter and the stove and he got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. The frying pan was on the stove still mostly filled with eggs. A package of land o'Lakes cheese was left out. There were two wraps on their wooden cutting board, one partially filled with the egg mixture. What could have caused Dean to leave a mess like this? His husband was a complete neat freak, so this was totally out of character. Was he just running late? God, was there an emergency? Castiel flew over to his phone and picked it up to check for messages.

"Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no," Cas repeated to himself softly, as he clutched the phone and sank down to the floor, his back against the kitchen counter.


	2. Chapter 2

Castiel knew that sitting on the floor while panicking wasn't getting him anywhere. He knew that. But damn if he didn't need _just a minute_. It looked bad, he knew that. He needed to find Dean and explain. If he could just find Dean and explain, everything would be okay again. Cas nodded to himself in solidarity with his plan and rose up from the floor.

He went through the motions, putting the cheese back in the refrigerator, dumping the eggs in the trash. He washed and dried the pan and put it away. As he left the kitchen, his eyes scanned the living room and he couldn't help the small smile that came to his lips. His husband was always neat, but he had been on a cleaning jag this week. Castiel didn't doubt he could eat off of every surface in the room. Even the cushions on their brown couch had been vacuumed. The bookshelf next to the tv had been reorganized in alphabetical order. The DVDs under the tv stand were put into categories by genre. All of the pictures along the beige half wall that separated the kitchen from the living room, were meticulously dusted. He knew this was how Dean occupied himself at night while he was still at work. He would make dinner, always leaving a plate for Cas, clean the already clean house, busy himself with the tv, occasionally texting Cas to bitch that he wasn't there to watch Doctor Sexy with him, then go to bed so he could be up at five am.

Castiel went back into the bedroom, throwing a pair of jeans, a white collared shirt and one of Dean's Singer Auto zip up sweatshirts on the bed. Casual Friday meant he could dress how he pleased and he wanted the comfort of Dean's scent until he could have the real thing. He went into the shower but did not indulge himself as he usually did. Jacking off to thoughts of his husband, when he knew Dean was out there hurt and upset, just seemed wrong. Castiel also didn't think the anxiety pooling in his stomach would have let him enjoy himself anyway, despite the fact that his husband was walking sex. Seriously, his lover and best friend looked photo shopped, though Dean would blush and look away whenever Cas tried to tell him so.

Castiel dressed and walked back out to get his phone, taking another minute to try to figure out what he was going to say. _Yes Dean, I was out with Alfie and I can't tell you why_ just wasn't going to fly. He doubted the clichéd _It's not what you think_ would go over too well, either. Though now that he thought about it, Cas felt a spurt of anger bubble up. _Shouldn't it go over?_ Yes, he'd lied, but didn't he deserve the benefit of the doubt? _Hell yes he did_. Over twenty years of friendship and nearly four years of marriage had earned him the damn benefit of the doubt. Dean should have confronted him instead of just leaving without a word. _Yes, this was good. The anger was good._ He thought to himself. Better to be on the offensive than the defensive.

Castiel wasn't niave, he knew part of his anger just hid the fear that Dean had left and wasn't coming back.

Cas scrolled to his love's name and hit send.

_And you_

_shook me all night long_

_yeah you, shook me all night long_

Cas' head whipped up as he heard the muffled sounds of the ringtone Dean had set for when he called. Cas saw his leather jacket draped over the back of the recliner.

"That little shit," he swore viciously, stalking over to pull the phone out of the scarred pocket.

Cas hit end on the call, and scrolled through to see if there were any messages. He found a group one sent to Bobby and Benny saying he was sick and not to bug Cas because he was at work. "Pfft," he grumbled out loud. He found a reply from Bobby telling him to _Feel better boy_ and one from Benny saying he'd handle Adler. Well, there would be no point rushing to Dean's work during his lunch break, since he wasn't even there. _Ah yes, mad wearing off slightly, panic settling back in nicely._ Where the fuck was his husband? 

* * *

 

Dean was already regretting leaving his phone behind. Castiel was probably freaking the fuck out. He was angry as hell, but that didn't mean he wanted to scare his husband. He knew Cas had one last class that morning, then grading, and a final staff meeting before he was supposed to come home and clean up for the dinner. _If there really was a dinner_ his inner voice taunted.

Dean had driven aimlessly for a while before hitting route 3 south on the highway. He was halfway there, before he realized where he was going. It was a little after nine when he pulled up to the beach parking lot. He and Cas had spent many a summer day here when they were teens. Plymouth was a tourist town though, so Dean was grateful it was too early in the season for that. It was quiet, and he could see only a handful of people walking along the beach when he got out of his car.

He'd forgotten how chilly it could be there in the spring. He rubbed his arms briskly before remembering he had Cas' B.U. sweatshirt in the back seat. He pulled it on, then grabbed his aviators from the visor. Considerably warmer, he headed down the short stairs to the beach, and started walking. The sound of the waves crashing was soothing, as was the salty air. From where he was, he could just make out the jetty. Sometimes Dean and Cas would bring Sam with them and they would have to carry a bucket because Sam would collect every shell he could find, broken or not. Cas was just as bad with the sea glass. _Just try to imagine what this_ _might have been Dean,_ he would say.  _By the color, I'm guessing a beer bottle_  he would reply, earning himself a playful shove.

When he got to the jetty, he climbed up the rocks and walked the path about halfway before sitting down. The water lapped at the bottom of his perch and there were periwinkle littered all over the rocks. It was weird being there without Cas. Dean tilted his head back towards the sun and sighed. He would have to deal with it, he couldn't hide away forever. But this had been necessary. He'd needed to get away. He was glad he hadn't confronted Cas right away. He needed this chance to cool down, otherwise he may have said something he'd regret later. If they were ever going to fix whatever was wrong with them, he had to be calm and level-headed. Cheating wasn't Castiel's style. He truly believed that. But lying wasn't his style either and there was the rub. Had Cas been in touch with Alfie all this time and been afraid to tell him about it? Was it some crazy one night stand that he regretted and hoped Dean would never know about? The thought made him sick and light-headed. That still didn't ring true, so maybe Cas didn't cheat, but perhaps wanted too? Was there really a staff meeting, but he had run into Alfie accidentally? Was this the real reason they had barely touched these last few days, because he'd been planning to see Alfie? These were all the questions running through Dean's head and Castiel was the only one who could answer them.

Dean got up and walked backed down the jetty the way he came. The tide was going out, and the beach was getting busier, but still not crowded. When Dean got back to the Impala, he drove down to the waterfront after stopping for a coffee. He parked and just sat, drinking his beverage. He could see the replica of the Mayflower from his spot. It was their anniversary next Thursday. Dean had been thinking of getting them a hotel for a few days. Maybe New Hampshire or Maine, some place where Cas could antique to his heart's content, or do some hiking, or berry picking or some other out-in-the-nature shit, that his husband loved so much. Now he guessed he would just see.

* * *

 

Cas was a mess all day. He was completely distracted during class, constantly checking his phone, hoping for some point of contact from Dean. Anything, even a passed on message, would work for him. He was short-tempered with everyone. Cas snapped at some of his students for giggling before the exam, and he thinks he may have even graded some essays a little harsher than necessary. By noon he was practically pulling his hair out. When Balthazar and Charlie came and asked him to join them at the cafe for lunch he didn't even look up from his desk.

"Busy."

He then proceeded to call Sam and Jo's house. Jo answered on the third ring.

"Hey Cas _,_ what's up? _Cause the caller id,_ _how did you think I knew, telepathy?_

"Jo," he began.

"Sorry Cas, what can I do for you?"

"I was just wondering if you had-

" _I don't know what he wants yet, Jesus Sam. Just finish the dishes and quit stalling_.

" Jo, have you-"

" _No Sam, it is fair. I am going to be at work all night, on my feet. All you did today was sit in an office reading briefs_."

"Jo, please-"

" _Oh please, don't give me that crap. You_ _know what? I'll just ask Cas. I'm sure he'll say that since I am the one who's gonna be on her feet all night, you can do the fricken dinner dishes_."

"Jo, I just-"

" _That's what I thought-_ "

"JoAnna Beth!" Cas erupted, fed up. "I just want to know if you have heard from Dean today?"

"No honey, I haven't. Is everything okay?"

Castiel sighed "Yeah, it's fine. I gotta go."

"Hey Cas, wait-" was all he heard before hanging up.

By the time the staff meeting was ready to begin, he was pretty sure he looked unstable. His hair was sticking up like he'd been electrocuted. He had a huge coffee stain on the front of Dean's sweatshirt and ink stains on his hands from all of the comments he'd written on the students essays. His knee bounced up and down impatiently, to the point where Balthazar put his hand on Cas' knee to still it.

"Calm the fuck down, Cassie," he whispered out of the corner of his mouth.

Luckily the Academic advisor wasn't paying attention to them, all the way in the back room. Cas didn't know why they were going through this anyway. They knew what classes they were teaching the next semester, they knew of the schedule changes. How many more times did they have to go over it? He'd already decided to skip the dinner, mandatory or not. He had more important things to deal with than whether or not it was in the budget to replace the seating in lecture hall C. _Damn it, Dean_. He should have heard from him by now. This was a cruel punishment, making him worry like this. God knows what he was up to, what he was doing in the state of mind he was probably in when he left. _Please don't be doing anything crazy_ he prayed to himself.

When he came home with Alfie that first year in college, he'd been so nervous to introduce him to Dean. He had needed that best friend stamp of approval. And he got it. Dean told him he thought Alfie was great, that it was obvious that he cared about him a lot. Dean had only showed a flicker of surprise when Cas had turned up home with a boy. He had hugged him and told him how happy he was for him. Castiel had buried the little kernel of disappointment that Dean didn't seem jealous with all the other inappropriate feelings he had for the young man. Shoved it down and locked it in the little heart-shaped box that he thought would never see the light of day. A few days after coming home with Alfie, he saw Dean having a heavy make-out session with a fellow senior named Aaron out in the back of Bobby's shop. There was a bottle of Captain Morgan in front of the beat up truck they were leaning against. He'd just kept on walking, but Dean had seen him and stumbled after him.

_"Hey ya, Cas. Where's the Alfinator?"_

_"Hello, Dean. He's at my house. I was coming to see if you wanted to have dinner with us, but it looks like your pretty busy."_

_Dean snorted. "Just trying to mend my broken heart, buddy. I mean, he's not Mister Right," he staged whispered, "but he's Mister right now."_

_Castiel tilted his head, looking at him quizzically. "Broken heart? Did something happen while I was away, Dean?"_

_Dean laughed, putting a hand on Cas' shoulder. "Nothing you need to worry about Cas, I promise. Go enjoy your dinner."_

Castiel knew now, of course, that he was one the one who had broken Dean's heart, however inadvertently.

Cas glanced at the clock on his phone. It was nearly five and he'd had enough. Just as he started to rise, ready to blow off the rest of the meeting, his phone buzzed. _I'm headed to the roadhouse for my shift._ _Quit freaking out_."

 _Quit freaking out_. Well, it wasn't poetry, but it was better than nothing. He must have talked to Jo. He wondered if he said anything to them. Had Dean told his brother that he suspected his husband was a lying cheat? Did he just play dumb as to why Cas had called looking for him?

The relief Cas felt now that he knew where Dean was, made his limbs weak for a moment. He was breathing better, not even realizing until then, that he had been partly holding his breath for most of the day. His stomach actually ached a little from the strain. He was also finding his mad again. Dean should have contacted him sooner. Angry or not. He should not have left Castiel wondering if he was laying in a ditch somewhere or drinking himself stupid at some bar. _God damn it, he should know without me having to tell him that I would never hurt him like that._ Suspicious text or not.


	3. Chapter 3

When Dean got home from the beach, he was tired. He felt like he hadn't slept in a week. If Dean had the time, he would have laid down in bed right then. Unfortunately, he had to work. Dean cursed himself again for agreeing to cover this shift, especially when he knew there was no way out of it. Dean walked into the kitchen and noticed that it had been cleaned. Knowing Cas, he'd probably done so on auto pilot, using the mundane chore to help him think things through. He couldn't help but wonder how his day had gone. Was Castiel as miserable as Dean? Was he angry that he had left? Scared? _Probably a bit of both,_ Dean mused.

Dean saw that his coat had been moved to the couch, phone laying beside it. He had three text messages.

_Sender: Bitch_

_Hey, is everything alright? Cas called here looking_ _for you_.

_Sender:Jo_

_Hey, Bobby said you were sick. Does Cas know_ _you stayed home? You might wanna_ _let him know_.

The last one was only a half hour old.

_Sender: Jo_

_If you need to bail, we can manage_.

Oh, how he wanted to bail, but he knew that wouldn't be fair.

 _From You: I'm good, see you soon_.

Dean went to the bedroom, threw his coat on the bed and changed into his black Roadhouse tee-shirt that he wore whenever covering a shift. He found a note from Cas on the dresser.

 _Please call me and let me know_ _you are okay_.

_Love Cas_

Dean laughed bitterly. He was far from okay, but he texted Cas anyway, before he grabbed his jacket and headed off to work.

Jo and Ash could tell immediately that he was not in the mood to talk and they had the good sense to leave him alone. Dean did his job fast and efficiently. He smiled and laughed at all the right times, well practiced in how the bartender scene worked. If you winked, if you flirted a little bit, the tips were bigger. Usually Dean would ham it up, but today he was just doing the bare minimum, which was fine. The bare minimum had still filled his tip jar twice over already. It was just heading towards 6:30 when he heard Jo call out to someone.

"Hey, Cas."

Dean looked over, still shaking up the kamikaze mixture for a cute little red-head that was looking him up and down.

"Here you go, sugar, that'll be 6.75."

The girl handed him a ten and with a wink, told him to keep the change. By this point, Castiel had found his way up to the bar. Dean kept on serving his customers, not readily acknowledging his husband. He had to give him props for patience, though, as he just stood there silently, as if he were just a patron awaiting his turn. As Dean pulled two _Bud_ _Light_ bottles from the cooler, he let his eyes roam over Cas. His husband looked wrecked. He still carried his briefcase, so Cas must have come straight from work. His dark tousled hair was in worse shape than usual, and he had what looked like ink smudges on his cheekbone. He was wearing one of Dean's sweatshirts and it looked like it had gone to war with a drink and lost, no doubt to coffee. The guy had the nerve to look like he needed a fucking hug. Dean hardened himself.

"What are you doing here, Cas?"

"Hello, Dean. I wanted to talk. I've been trying to find you all day," Castiel's tone was somber.

"Yes, well I didn't want you to find me. I needed some space. And now I need to work," Dean said, and nodded at the older gentleman at the end of the bar signaling for a refill. For the next fifteen minutes there was an influx of people and Dean took their orders and made small talk, and all the while, Cas just stood there waiting, as though he had all the time in the world. No one but Dean, would be able to notice the slight tightening of his stubbled jaw as the sign of irritation it was. He headed back over to his husband.

"Look, you should just go home. I don't want to do this while I'm working."

"Dean, I feel like-"

"I honestly don't care how you feel right now," Dean interrupted, shocking Castiel into silence. "You fucked up, you can damn well wait until I am ready to talk."

"Dean, I know how it looks, but I swear, it isn't what you think, " Cas pleaded with him. Dean plastered on a fake smile for the next customer before turning back to Cas.

"Really? It's not? Cause to me, it looks like you lied to me about some staff meeting so you could go out to dinner with your ex. Sound about right to you?"

Something sparked in Castiel's eyes, and the frustration was rolling off of him in waves.

"I mean, I gotta ask you. Is this the reason why?" Dean's voice was harsh.

"Why what?" Cas looked confused as to where Dean was going with his line of questioning.

"Is this the reason why we've barely touched this week?" Dean leaned a little closer as if sharing a secret. "Was it exciting? Lying to me and sneaking around behind my back? "

"Yes, Dean, you figured out my masterful plan," Castiel scoffed.

Dean's face remained stoic.

"Oh my God, you're serious aren't you?"

Dean should have stopped there. The look of intense pain on Cas' face was enough to let him know that he was going too far. Cas was guilty of lying, but he knew deep down he hadn't been unfaithful. Now that Dean had started though, it was like he had verbal diarrhea and he couldn't stop himself. He was shooting for the heart and he had perfect aim.

"Did it make you feel like a teenager again? Did you bend over real pretty to show him what was mine," Dean looked at him coyly and winked. "Was he as good as you remembered?"

Castiel leaned in across the bar right up in Dean's face. "Fuck. You."

The line was officially crossed, but still, Dean just smirked. "I kinda had to ask."

Cas inhaled hard at that. "It should never have been a question," he spat out, viciously, before turning on his heel and walking out the door.

Dean felt immediate regret. He had gone too far, he knew it as he was spewing and yet he had just kept on going. His brain was just an emotional stew, with different emotions bubbling to the top at any given moment. Anger, sadness, concern. It was like he wanted to strangle his husband and kiss him better at the same time. Dean could not wait until his shift was over. He was so done with the shit storm that had been his day, and he was pretty damn sure Cas was done too.

* * *

 _He actually believed it_. Castiel hadn't thought, not really, not deep down, that Dean would truly believe he would cross that line. He felt sick and utterly exhausted. All he had wanted earlier was to see Dean and confront him about leaving that morning with no word. Of course, all that righteous anger had disappeared the moment he saw Dean standing behind that bar, all fake smiles and forced laughter. He was never really mad in the first place, it was just all that was holding him together as he worried about where Dean had gone. But now? Now he was mad. Mad and heartsick at the things Dean had said to him. Did he really believe that? That Castiel would be so cruel as to just cheat on him and take joy in doing so? To go as far as to laugh about it? Or was it just Dean's anger speaking? He had thought they had come so far with Dean's self worth issues and insecurities. To question, for even one second that he could want anyone else, that he could be happier with anyone other than Dean, was just so foreign to him. Yet Dean's words played on a continuous loop in his head. _Was he as good as you remembered_? God, it made him sick.

With shaking hands he grabbed Dean's pillow then went to the linen closet and pulled out some bedding and threw it all on the couch. If Dean really thought those terrible things about him, he wouldn't want to share a bed with him anyway. Castiel stumbled back into their bedroom, and crawled onto the bed, not bothering with covers, not even aware that he was sobbing. Because he was angry, sad or both, he couldn't be sure. He fell asleep clutching Dean's jacket.

* * *

It was close to midnight when Dean walked in. He was bone weary and hated that his night was not over. He looked over at the couch and his banked anger flowed anew, as he took in the sight of his pillow and some blankets laid out on the couch, obviously meant for him.

"Oh, hell no," he muttered out loud.

Dean strode briskly down the hall and banged open the bedroom door, not caring how loud and flicked on the light switch on the wall. Castiel sat up abruptly, fisting at his eyes like a child rudely awakened. He peered up at Dean, and the tear tracks dried on his face nearly did him in. Nearly.

"You wanna explain to me how I find out you've been having secret dinners with your ex behind my back, yet somehow, I'm on the couch?" Dean's voice held baffled disbelief.

"You know very well why you're on the couch tonight, Dean, so don't play stupid," Castiel said, voice hoarse from his earlier tears.

Dean laughed mirthlessly. "Oh, okay. That's how you wanna play it. Well fuck that noise. I am sleeping here, in my room, on my bed," and with that he flopped right down. Cas made a move to get up.

"Fine. I'll sleep on the couch." Dean reached over and grabbed his wrist.

"Oh, I don't think so sweetheart, you're-"

"Don't!" Cas interrupted, voice wavering with something more than anger. "Do NOT call me that. You don't get call me that when we're like...whatever we are right now."

Dean looked at Castiel and his eyes softened. His husband looked ready to break, panting, face red and eyes glittering with angry tears. And with that, the wind blew right out of Dean's sails.

"Okay," he began gently, "Okay Cas, I'm sorry."

Cas' shoulders shook as he became wracked with silent sobs. Dean tugged him into his lap and Cas wrapped his legs around Dean's waist, as he was embraced.

"Shh. Shhh. We'll figure it out, I promise. Calm down," Dean stroked one hand up and down Castiel's back and fisted the other in his hair, gently rubbing the scalp. Cas clutched at the back of Dean's shirt as his breaths slowly began to even out and his cries settled down to little sniffs.

"I hate this," Cas whispered into Dean's neck.

"Me too."

Castiel pulled back to look at his husband, and Dean gently thumbed away the tears still glistening on his cheeks.

"I just can't believe you would actually think-"

"I don't, Cas."

"But you..."

"I was angry."

"You were trying to hurt me," Cas' voice was filled with sorrow.

"Yes."

"You've never deliberately tried to hurt me before," his voice broke a little on that and Dean sighed.

"I'm sorry. Truly, Cas, I am. I know you wouldn't do that. Even if you wanted to, you don't have it in you to be that hurtful. If you wanted out, you'd have the respect to just tell me to my face. But damn it, I was hurt. And pissed off. And for fuck sake, Castiel, you lied to me! "

"I was going to tell you!"

"But you didn't. I had to find out through some random text. That blindsided me. I felt so stupid. Like I should have known you were being dishonest or something. And the scary thing is, when I think back on it, how it rolled off your tongue so easily... man, you didn't even look like you felt guilty."

Cas reached up to cup Dean's cheeks. "Because I didn't. I don't. I was doing it for you," Dean's brows winged up at that.

"You were going behind my back, having a secret dinner with Alfie, for me?" his tone held mocking disbelief.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I can't tell you yet."

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Castiel actually huffed out a laugh and Dean looked at him indignantly. "Really, Cas?"

"I'm not kidding you. I will tell you, but I can't yet, it will ruin the surprise."

"So are there going to be _more_ of these secret dinners?" Dean asked, still irked, but relieved that the crisis seemed to have passed.

"I know you are mad that I lied, I get it. And I am sorry for that. I should have been upfront to begin with about seeing him. It just didn't occur to me that it would turn into this mess. Today was the worst day, Dean, the worst day ever," Castiel said, choking up again. Dean pressed his forehead to Cas' and closed his eyes, silently agreeing.

"So, you didn't answer me. Any more pow wows I should be aware of?"

"Just one more. Is that okay? I mean, now that you know it's for you?"

"Technically, I don't really know anything," Dean pouted.

Castiel tilted his head in question and rubbed at the nape of Dean's neck. "You know, I thought you liked Alfie."

"He was a nice kid, sure, but that doesn't mean I want you hanging out with him, Cas."

"Okay, but... I mean... you're okay with me seeing Balthazer," his tone was confused.

"You weren't in love with Balthazar," Dean stated softly. "He wasn't your first kiss," Dean continued, pushing his hands through Cas' hair. "You didn't fuck Balthazar in your childhood bedroom while I cried myself to sleep in the building across the street."

"Oh, Dean," Cas breathed out, understanding coloring his tone. "Baby, he wasn't my first love, you were."

"It's just different, Cas," Dean finished with a whisper. "But I trust you. And I guess the best way to prove that to you, is to let this go."

Cas pulled Dean's mouth to his in a soft kiss. "Thank you, baby," he whispered against his lips.

"Yeah, yeah. This better be a kick ass surprise," Cas laughed out loud before kissing Dean again. He moved his hands up fist in Dean's hair. They sighed into each others mouths and Dean could taste the salt of Cas' tears on his tongue. He held him tighter as they sucked and nibbled at each others lips. Cas broke away to nudge at Dean's jaw line. He began to slowly kiss at it before trailing down his neck, sucking at the skin there, leaving a dark bruise. He continued to lick and suck as he played with hem of Dean's tee-shirt. Dean quickly got with the program and reached down to pull it over his head, before reaching out to tug at Castiel's shirt as well. They resumed kissing, moaning together when warm skin met warm skin, arms twined around each other's necks. Dean stroked Cas' tongue with his own, as his fingers trailed up to play with his nipples. Cas hissed in pleasure as Dean plucked at them. When he bent his head down to suck at a stiffened peak, Cas whimpered.

" _Oh fuck, Dean_ ," Castiel had both hands tangled in Dean hair, holding him to his chest as Dean continued to nibble and suck at his right nipple, paying special attention to the cute little freckle right above it. Castiel unconsciously rocked in Dean's lap as he began to lave at the left one. Cas tugged his mouth back to his and licked in, eagerly as he scratched his short nails down Dean's back, causing his husband to growl into his mouth.

Dean gently pushed Cas down onto the bed, head facing the footboard and encouraged him to unwrap his legs from his waist so he could remove his jeans. Dean mouthed at Cas' belly button and he unsnapped his jeans and slowly pulled the zipper down. Dean tugged them down his legs, happy to see Castiel had forgone his boxers. He took turns sucking at each sharp hip bone. Biting and licking at them, as Cas white-knuckled the bed cover. Dean slowly began to nibble his way down from the hipbones to the tops of his thighs. Dean could feel them quivering, as he licked and sucked.

" _Mmm, Dean. Please,"_ Castiel moaned and spread his legs wantonly. Dean kneaded at the flesh as he nosed at Cas's inner thighs, alternating licks, bites and sucking kisses.

" _Ah, ah, you_ -you're having fun teasing me," Cas voice was breathy as he arched into the touch of Dean's mouth. Dean gave him a long look from under his lashes.

"Just reclaiming what's mine, Castiel," he whispered, before taking Cas' hard leaking cock into his mouth.

 _"Jesus fuck_ ," Cas hissed, and couldn't help thrusting into Dean's mouth. Dean, knowing Cas so well, was prepared for it and relaxed his throat. He hummed and moaned around the hard length in his mouth, reducing his husband to a mess of pants and whimpers.

" _Oh yes. Baby, ah, ah, oh so good. So fucking wet."_ Cas babbled as he continued to fuck Dean's face. When he felt Dean's finger trace over his pucker, he nearly cried. Dean pulled up for minute to remove his jeans, as it had become painfully restrictive on his own dripping hardness. Cas used the opportunity to sit up and reach into the nightstand for the lube. He tossed it on the side of the bed and proceeded to push Dean back into the pillows and straddled his hips. Cas leaned down and tugged Dean's bottom lip into his mouth, giving it a long suck before plunging his tongue into his mouth. Cas dragged his fingers down over Dean's nipples, tweaking along the way. He gripped at Dean's hips as they continued to kiss, happy to have this again.

"I love you, Dean, I love you so much," Cas said desperately. Dean reached up to stroke at his cheeks, wiping away tears that Castiel wasn't aware of crying.

"Oh, sweetheart, I love you too."

Castiel reached next to himself and grabbed the lube, slicking up his own fingers. Dean's breath hitched as he watch Cas rise to his knees and reach behind himself. Cas bit his lip and tipped his head back as he rode his own fingers, stretching himself for Dean's cock. Dean reached up to trail his hand down Castiel's throat, watching his husband in awe.

"Fuck, sweetheart, you have no idea how stunning you are. So gorgeous for me."

"Just for you, Dean." Cas groaned. Cas pulled his fingers out and dripped a little more lube on his fingers before reaching back to slick Dean up. Then, with a wink at his love, he turned around, giving Dean a perfect view of his slick, greedy hole as he sank down on Dean's hardened shaft. They moaned in unison, as Castiel bottomed out. Dean gripped Cas' hipbones tightly as he fought for control, trying to not blow his load before they'd really begun. Cas began to rise and fall and Dean watched, entranced, as his slicked up cock slid in and out of Cas' tight channel.

" _Ah, ah, ah, nnnhg, fuck. Oh fuck, Castiel."_

Cas moaned at hearing his name, coming out of Dean's mouth, sounding so wrecked. He began to bounce harder and cried out when he found that perfect angle that hit his prostate.

 _"Unh, unh, unh, Dean, oh yes, oh fuck yes_." Castiel was coming apart as Dean planted his feet to thrust up hard into his husband. They were a symphony of grunts and groans, and Dean could hear the slick sounds of Cas' hand flying over his cock, and that coupled with the visual of his own dick disappearing into Cas' firm ass, made Dean come harder than he had in a long time.

Dean gently nudged Cas off of him, and encouraged him to lay on his back. Cas continued to strip himself furiously as Dean proceeded to spread Cas' cheeks and lick into his furled entrance. Dean speared his tongue inside, tasting his own cum, cinnamon lube and Cas' own earthiness that he never grew tired of.

 _"Dean, Dean, Dean, Dean,"_ Cas chanted, and when his husband pushed in two fingers along side his tongue and brushed against his sweet spot, Cas erupted.

_"Holy fuck!"_

Castiel was panting as Dean slid his sweat slicked body up his, and caged Cas' face with his forearms. He waited till Cas opened his eyes to lean down and give him a tender, sticky kiss.

"Love you."

Cas smiled his gorgeous gummy smile. "I love you too, baby."

After Dean cleaned them with a wet wipe from the drawer, they wrapped themselves around each other for a long time. Long enough for Castiel to think Dean had fallen asleep until he spoke.

"So, when _is_ the next dinner? Just so I know."

Castiel yawned. "Um, Tuesday, I think. Whatever night his wife has off work," he said, snuggling deeper into Dean's side.

Dean shot up, dislodging Cas.

"What the fuck, Dean?" he whined.

"He's married? To a chick?"

"Didn't I mention that?" Cas asked innocently, before cracking up.

"Son of a bitch."

* * *

 

The following Thursday, Castiel met Dean at work and dragged him outside for a walk.

"Cas, can't we just go home? I want to shower and we have reservations at that new Italian place you wanted to try."

"Quit your whining baby, it's time for your surprise."

That shut him up. Cas led him down the road to the park where they had first met as children. He lead them over to a wide backed bench.

"That's new." Dean commented.

"Mm hmm," Cas murmured. "Come, look at the back," he said, dragging Dean around to the other side. A heart shaped plaque was on the back of the bench.

**Dean &Castiel **

**Together Forever**

**May 17th 2012**

 

"Happy Anniversary, Dean."

Dean visibly swallowed. "How?"

Cas smiled softly at him. "Alfie's wife Krissy. She works for the town, helped me get all the right paper work together so I could have this done. Figured here would be best. It's where we began, Dean, even if we didn't know it yet."

Dean pulled Cas to him, holding him tight, and breathed in his apple scented hair.

"It's perfect. You're perfect."

"I wanted to do something special for you," Castiel murmured into Dean's chest. "Your always doing the big gestures, always showing me how much you love me. I wanted to give something back."

"Thank you, sweetheart."

They sat on the bench, holding hands, not leaving until the sun went down.

 

The End

Till next time:)


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